AaaaaWoooooooo....Raccoons of Waltham.

OK,
So if you remember from my earliest of Blogs I had mentioned a raccoon problem.

so here we go, so whats the scenerio... We have had a family of FIVE raccoons living on our porch roof.

right by my living room wall...
I hear them dig.
Babies crying for their mama.

One night I heard them fighting on the roof and one of them fell off and hit the porch with a HUGE thud right next to my bedroom window.

this is not your average cute little raccoon family, this is the WT that moves in next door and brings the value of the neighborhood way down...

SO after weeks of trying to trap these very scary beasts....mind you the Daddy raccoon is like the size of a small pony. He would not even begin to fit in the traps. He must look at the trap like...phew...mother f'er... that shits for dummies, I dont care about your dumb ass can of cat food. I eat children for lunch.

LAST NIGHT !!! I come home from work to see a raccoon party on the porch roof. there are raccoons in the traps, out of the traps, all over the place.

So I park the car and walk up the driveway to see what is going on. I turn the corner and the raccoon that is free sees me and starts hissing and threating to run off the roof and eat my face off if I come any closer. I decide, good. We caught a raccoon, now Tommy (my land lord) will come home and take the trap away and we will have one less raccoon to worry about.


NOPE.

Although I did call him and alert him that we had indeed caught a raccoon, he felt no need to come and remove the trap(s) I later found out there were two RACCOONS in two traps.

They screamed and howled all night long on the roof top.

SERIOUSLY?!?!?!?

Our neighbors must love us. Neither Kevin or I got much sleep due to the howling raccoons and the friends keeping vigil by their cageside.

Ice Cream Dreams and Beer Reality

Hey I kinda like the name of this posting.



Well it is Friday and instead of sitting in a parking lot otherwise known as 93 N. I am sitting at a computer working... If you must ask why. It is because I financial wizard that I have proven to be, cannot add, subtract, multiply and even divide for that matter. What is she rambling about you are thinking. She (Me) has over-drafted her bank account AGAIN.



AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH.
I hate it when I have typed a great blog and suddenly poof.

Gone...
That is what happened to the rest of this story.

The Cutest Birthday Wish EVER !!!

This is my Schmoop. The Schnookums himself...Eli.

Holy Coolest Thing EVER !!!!

Cat Power

21 May 2008 12:36

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY BIRTHDAY !!

HAPPEEE HAPPEEEE BIRRRRTHDAY!!!

(sing outloud to urself, since i unfortunately,
can't be there with u :(


HAPPPY HAPPPY HAPPPY PAPPY HAPPPPY
BIRFDAY BIRTHDAY, ONE AND ONLY BORN ONCE
IT'S YOUR DAY!!!

H A P P Y H A P P Y B I R T H D A Y

TO Y O U !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


thank you thank you for ur being my "friend"
and i hope that this birthday message finds
you, indeed, very happy
:)

with L O V E
YR O THE RAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
WORK WHAT U WERE BORN WITH!!!!!!!!
xx
chan
ps. top friend on my page.


Cat Power's Friend Space (Top 20)

Cat Power has 130591 friends.

You Are Michele Lee Alan Appaloosa ADDIQUIT mr.pharmacist JAY-Z Mary J. Blige Livingroom Johnston the paparazzi stefano Lesley Arfin Dirty Three

Quite Possibly Heaven

Chocolate Covered What?

A candy shop in Santa Cruz called Marini's is selling chocolate covered bacon. I don't know whether to lick my chops or bust a chunk in a plastic bag.

I'm willing to give it a bite. Upon further googling, I found a recipe for this possibly delicious treat. I know what I'm doing this weekend. Frying, eating and barfing! My three favorite things.

Cut to Brit Brit who is not impressed, "Pff'! I've been eatin' that stuff fo' years. Mah mama je'e made it fo' Sunday breakfist. We had it wif possum an' eggs an' sanka cake!"

One Liners.

Well you all are aware that sometimes my life is filled with colorful people and characters.

I was thinking about conversations I have either been a part of or that have been going on around my general vicinity this past weekend. But when I think about it I think I was taking part in these.

I decided I would pull the best lines out of the conversations and share them with you. Also, I am going to mix them up a bit.

They are in no particular order or by no means part of the same conversations...

"The first time I ever did blow was with Ike Turner, man did he have some good shit".

"We were also friends with... she was not an attractive woman, but she was married to a count...Italian I think".

"I dated Mary Wilson for three years, hung out with the Supremes a lot...used to call them, the girls"

"Did you hear about so and so...he donated 20 million to Northeastern, 20 Million to ..., 20 million to... 5 million to the BSO (Boston Symphony Orchestra) he doesn't care much for the arts".

Friday at last.

So I have decided to use this blog not only to post about things that happen in my life but to also share the random and wacky things I come across on the internet.

It is finally Friday and am so looking forward to tomorrow. The Black Keys are in town!!! They are playing at the Orpheum in Boston and I am really excited about it. I know they are doing Oceans and Streams for their encore song, this happens to be my favorite of theirs so I am psyched.

Really it has been a boring week...I am heading to VT next weekend. I am bringing Ron with me to Maggie and Andy's. He has been down in the dumps lately and I can totally tell.

He texted me and asked me what I wanted for my birthday.

I told him a baby.

Which he relented and said fine. Now, this means nothing in itself, because it is not going to happen, BUT the old Ron would have fought me tooth and nail on this issue.

We have had this conversation before. Because if I were in the position to have a child I would surely have one with him. Probably be dis-owned but whatever. Our kid would be tall and have great hair.

So we had a day long banter back and forth and then a conversation about it tonight...

I think we settled on a cup of coffee instead.

Wacky...yet, COOL

http://fishki.net/comment.php?id=32304

I found this online. It is a site where people take children's drawings and turn them into photos.

NKOTB

This is amazing !!!

It does seem to get snagged at the beginning but you can slide the play bar a little to the right and it will pick up the slack.

Things I learned Today

I just wanted to list the things I had learned today May 14th.

You can pull a muscle without actually doing anything.

My crushes gf is a hostess at the local bar, AND wears bad shoes.

If you don't have a heating pad, don't fret. A laptop can double as a heating pad.

The GF is cute.

Getting a contract stuck in the copier is really easy to do... when you leave a staple in.

That can lead to good things when said contact can help you out smart your high paid lawyers.

Amex out sources their customer service to India.

Buydig is probably the best online retailer I have ever dealt with.

And,

We have a long way to go before we win a softball game.

Good Will Gone Bad

So this afternoon while at work my boss and I decided to get cookies for the office...spread some afternoon cheer, plus I needed something to dunk in my Skinny Mocha Latte I was about to order from my local lifeline.

Being the goodwill ambassador in my office I agree to run to the local market and pick up some cookies. I go in select a few packages of choice cookies and decide to be on my way. I pay for my purchases and innocently head to my car. I climb in and happily start my Element and prepare for Mocha bliss...

Then out of the corner of my eye I see her. Before I can even stop myself I hear my voice calling out the window..."Carrie"?

I had recognized her from behind...

I knew that one day this was going to happen.

It is a small town and we both work in it. Last time I had seen her she had flat out told me I needed to leave and that she hoped to never see me again.

My therapist.

I had not seen her in almost a year, before my brother's diagnosis, before the job, before school (again)...there has been so much that has happened in the past year that I have not told her.

She gives me an odd look before recognition sets in. She comes over and starts to make small talk...what are you doing now? You never left... How are you? Where are you living?

I am trying my best to mumble the answers to the questions she is asking when all I want to do is cry. It is amazing to me that just the very sight of the woman can bring me to tears. Man if I had run into her last week I don't think I could have held my shit together.

After exchanging the usual pleasantries she asks if she will see me again. I say yes, I will call.
A strange relationship one can have with their therapist.

Then she asks do you have insurance? I say yes. I will call you soon.

As I pull away and head to my Mocha yumminess, I can not help but wonder...how much is she going to charge my insurance for that parking lot session.

Corporate Ballerina

So, much to my dismay I have joined my company's softball team. Needless to say anyone who knows me knows I am not really an athlete. I can't run more than 10 ft. without huffing and puffing.

Anyway, I show up at the game yesterday not at all displaying my usual nervousness. I really wasn't nervous. So we all are assigned our positions. To my horror I am the catcher. I freeze picturing a mask, squatting behind the hitter, finger gestures, chewing tobacco... I can't remember all that.

Luckily this is softball and not the MLB.

I just have to stand there and try and scoop up the ball when it come near me. I can do this. As we are warming up I decide to head to the outfield because I have spent the entire warm up session at my assigned position, catcher. I head to the outfield and stand there. I watch the guys make some nice catches.

SO...fast forward to the start of the game. One of the guys on our team is a no show. That leaves us one player short, that means positions are being changed, that means...I am no longer catcher. Suddenly all the self-assurance I had felt in my position was deflated.

Now I hear "Michele, you are in right field".

I am like OK. "Where is right field?"

We are up first. My team goes through the entire roster, until the last player, me. Dale is the last out right before me. Great I get to not only suffer through being in the outfield, waiting to be impaled by a gigantic yellow ball falling at light speed from the sky. Then, I get to be the first up to bat when it is our turn next. (Now would be a great time to mention that during warm up, I only hit 1 out of say 30 pitches)


I get up to bat and smack I hit the ball. I am so surprised I forget to run. My whole team is like run ...run. I actually make a run. I mean score a run.


I honestly did not do too bad. Of my 5 at bats I only struck out once. I did find myself acting totally ditsy at various points in the game.

For instance I swing, I miss, I apologize. Sorry.

I swing, I miss, I twirl around in a circle, 5yr old ballerina style.

I run to catch the ball, I miss, I trip I hit the ground hard, I roll. I grunt.

No matter what JS says...



Being a corporate ballerina is a lot of hard work.

Maybe My Life Isn't So Bad.

OK,
Well I was just on MySpace...yeah I know. But I also have a blog so what does that say? Anyway, I was going through some of the profiles of people I went to high school with. And what I say from this point on is not meant as any disrespect to anyone. It is just fact.
Back to my point...have you ever started looking, I mean really looking at the pictures people post. I do it all the time. If I meet a guy on the internet I of course scope out the whole picture and try and get more insight as to who they are as a person...anyway, I was looking a this one particular girls photos. OMG !!!
Seriously, I know I complain about my life but after seeing what could have been (in an alternate world) I am very great full for my life. I mean to be 31, dating a "guy", 2 children from another guy, living in a smoke filled house with the center piece of the living room being the futon...come on.
I am sure it is not what this particular girl would choose for her dream life, but the most interesting part of her entire MySpace picture fun were the captions of the photos.
Seriously, "Rock out with your cock out" showed up more than once...these are pictures with her kids in them...my favorite of the bunch was her sitting on the futon, looking into the camera, eating a McDonald's hamburger(?) with a caption "Where are my fucking fries asshole".
Then I realized. Life is Good.

Maybe Britian Does Have Talent.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdEw8xnsZDI

This made me smile yesterday.

Attempting to contruct a blog.

OK, so I have decided to join the revolution and start blogging like the rest of the world.
True to my nature my first concern is, what the hell am I going to blog about and who in the hell cares. But, I figure who cares. The way this week has been I deserve an outlet for my frustrations that does not include the ear of anyone who will listen.
This has been a crap-tastic week. I have spent months befriending and getting close to a certain person who after getting super close last week, decided he can't do it anymore. In all fairness he is a mess. His g-friend died in Jan. and he hasn't even begun to get over it. I knew this going into it. But recently things have gone past the normal "friends" banter... I truly enjoyed this guy. He was crazy, that is why I referred to him as "Crazy Guy". But true to his name he totally flipped out Sunday night and informed me he was too messed up to continue...whatever it was we were doing...friends...(In all fairness he said he was too fucked up, to project his craziness on anyone else) I just seemed to get attached to someone who needs to be fixed. I need to really rethink why i do this. I am not into fixer-upper guys. Damian put it very eloquently last night, "why buy a car with three wheels, when for a few dollars more you can get one with four". "Stop looking for cars that need a little work. Buy a new one". I thought it was very sound and funny advice.

OK, well I suppose that is enough for a starter blog. Next time I will tell you about the rabid racoon family that is living in my porch roof.